


Stranger Than Earth

by 3ff3rViskus



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alien Biology, Corruption, Dom/sub Undertones, Emotional Manipulation, F/F, Feral Behavior, Gem Sex, Mental Instability, Oviposition, Polyamory, Role Reversal, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 17:51:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9453023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3ff3rViskus/pseuds/3ff3rViskus
Summary: After the shock of being stranded on Earth passes, after appeasing the enemy and being accepted into their ranks, Peridot of Facet-2F5L Cut-5XG still doesn't know where she stands; and it's breaking her down.





	

**Author's Note:**

> [A/N: This takes place sometime after Jasper's corruption.]

Peridot digs impromptu-shifted toes into the sand. She still doesn’t fully understand the benefit of ‘toes’. She isn’t going to manipulate objects with her gravity-connectors, after all. She chalks it up to the others wanting her to gain additional ‘experiences’. Lazuli sits beside her, on a shared beach towel, lazily toying with the water around Steven, as part of a game of beachball in the shallows. 

Music is playing from a radio Greg brought, slabs of organic-flesh are sizzling on a ‘grill’ for later consumption, and the sound of splashing and laughter is audible. Lapis is a calm, elegant, pleasant company. Peridot finds herself somewhere other than the gathering however, her gaze drawn by the water further out from shore. 

She’s millions of miles away in her mind, recalling the bustle of a Gem capital, the first time she ever saw it. She remembers being in awe of it’s brilliance, so different from the dark and metallic bunkers she had spent most of her existence in. A crystalline world filled with spectrums and light only-partially perceivable to the human eye. 

In spite of being drilled and harassed mercilessly by her supervisor, Peridot had turned out to be one of the more talented of her sisters, and the news of her recommendation had come as a shock. Finding a peridot with just the right combination of spontaneous-thinking, archival-memory, and a willingness to follow commands was often a challenge. This class of Gem’s intelligent nature, which leads them to assume their thought-process is the superior one, makes them difficult to work with. 

Peridot’s first impressions of other Gem types, face-to-face, had made her grateful for her supervisor’s harsh attitude. It had prepared her for the strict hierarchy and hen-pecking of Gems who worked more closely in the affairs of her Diamond. Peridot had found herself in awe too, of the beauty of so many other Gem types. 

Her specialization as a kindergartner had prepared her for the personality-typings and overall common-appearances of other types of Gems, of course. But to /see/ them all, up close, radiant and moving, left her feeling that her prolonged observations were likely inappropriate. Her studying of them was certainly unprofessional, serving no real purpose other than pleasurable-fixation.

She remembers too, reading her assignment, steadily having difficulty containing her excitement. To be trusted with such a vital mission, at such a historic location, Peridot had never felt more /useful/. The feeling made her misty-eyed, distracted, and she would have walked straight into her commanding officer, had /that/ Jasper not extended their palm to halt Peridot. 

Though at the time, the surrounding Gems at that shipyard had a good laugh at Peridot’s expense, she hadn’t really noticed. She had been too busy slowly staring up at the imposing quartz that regarded her with a mixture of annoyance and challenge. That was the point where the volume of laughter had increased enough for Peridot to allow shame to become apparent on her features, and Jasper had turned to enter the ship without a word.

The beachball bounces none-too-gently off of Peridot’s gem, and Lapis snorts in amusement, dropping her water-clone from the game. A sheepishly-grinning Amethyst calls out from the shallows. Peridot looks down at the plastic patchwork of yellow, blue, and white with a frown. 

"Sorry, space-cadet, I thought you were looking!"

Said space-cadet gets up from the beach towel wordlessly, and trots over to glare menacingly at the ball before kicking it back towards the others. She hears some chatter going on, possibly someone chastising Amethyst, or Steven trying to talk Peridot into joining them. The details are lost on her as she grinds quartz-sand under her feet and listens to the roar of the water. 

"Hey…what's going on with you…?"

Lapis is beside her suddenly, like a mildly-concerned ghost. Peridot considers doing calculations in her mind, reciting factual tidbits to herself about the sediment around her. The effects of the planet’s moon on the tides. It’s gravity level. Conversions of earth’s planetary cycles in comparison to those of other planets she’s known…anything to make this place feel more solid under her. 

"I've just…been thinking. Remembering. Wondering."

"Oh." 

Peridot’s response doesn’t really answer Lapis’ question, but her companion doesn’t press for details. Lazuli seems to lack a certain emotional intelligence, or perhaps the emotions of others simply make her uncomfortable. Peridot really isn’t sure. 

The blue Gem returns her focus to the beachball game when the others catch her attention. The water-clone is replaced with the real thing, and Peri watches the lot of them, feeling detached. Lazuli might ask her about it again later on, when the others aren’t around.

The technician steps forward into the ocean of her own accord. It swallows her up so quickly, the water is up to her chin by the time she gets close to Amethyst. The game is paused.

"Peapod, you wanna play? We can move this over to the sand."  
"No. I just need to investigate something."

She submerges herself fully under the water, pushing against sliding silt to move further, deeper. What is it like to be at the bottom? In the dark? Surrounded by all that pressure? She wants to understand.

At first, the experience isn’t /too/ bad. The unfamiliar sensory input, the muffled auditory, the blurred visual, is all jarring at best. Her gem does what it can to adjust to the distortion. There is enough light still to make out vegetation and sea creatures. The surface of the water is a blue glow from the planet’s star burning in the sky. It’s strange, but not what Peridot would call a ‘tomb’. She goes even deeper.

The level of darkness becomes increasingly difficult for her form to process. There’s a dull roar, constant, that seems to chase away any and all other sounds. She eventually finds herself struggling to take steps, all her movements feeling infuriatingly slow.

Its at this point that Peridot stops, too discouraged to go any further. She can’t see anything at all anymore. Her gem lights up, trying to break through the blackness. Still, even her hands are barely visible to her. It’s like standing in space, wide and open and silent. But there are no stars. 

She can’t even compare it to the darkness of forming beneath the soil of a planet. That was a safe and comfortable place, where her gem could perceive the vibrations of machinery on the surface, and the resonance of her sisters forming in the ground around her. On the seabed she just feels alone and vulnerable.

Just as Peridot considers re-orienting her direction to find her way back, there’s a surge in the salty liquid, and she’s moving impossibly fast. Her surroundings propel her up, the levels of light increase rapidly, and she realizes Lazuli has raised the ocean to find her. Through the wall of water Peridot can make out the blobbish shapes of the Crystal-Gems back on the beach. 

She’s pulled from the tower of ocean, trapped in her own little bubble, to come face to face with Lapis. She is not pleased. The blue Gem reaches her hand into the bubble and tugs Peridot out of it, tucking the smaller one under her arm. Everything seems so much louder, now that Peridot is back in the open atmosphere. The rhythmic flapping of Lazuli’s water wings is almost grating. Her voice is sharp.

"What were you /doing?/"  
"…I was…curious."

Lapis makes an aggravated sound, like Peridot is trying her patience.

"You can't just…wander off like that. How am I supposed to find you? What if I needed you? What if you fell down a trench?"

The green Gem isn’t sure what to say to that, looking away with a frown. In the past, she would have basked in the attentions of a higher-ranking Gem, even while being chastised. She would have been proud to be considered so important, so non-expendable. Lazuli’s way of addressing her, the possessive tone, it’s familiar and reminds Peridot of home. That used to be a good thing.

Lapis lets out an exasperated sigh and flies the both of them back to the beach. Once they land, Peridot is left reassuring the rest of the group that everything is fine, while she wonders what caused this shift in her thinking. Why does her bond with Lapis suddenly feel so…’off’? Why does she keep thinking about homeworld? Lapis /is/ her little piece of homeworld, isn’t she? A comrade?

Peridot fought so hard, in the beginning, to gain Lazuli’s approval. In this small pool of other Gems, the only ones she can be a part of, now that homeworld is off-limits…Lapis outranks even a quartz. Peridot’s instincts had screamed at her that it was absolutely vital she win the favor of the top-Gem. If the top-Gem didn’t like her, she was as good as dust. That’s how it always was back home.

She supposes it’s the effect the earth-Gems have had on her, since becoming stranded on this planet, that’s caused this change. At first she found their chaotic social structure, their complete disregard for pecking order of any kind, alienating and confusing. Who was really the leader of the Crystal-Gems? She still doesn’t know. Even Lapis seems to defer to Steven at times.

Through her observations however, Peridot has to admit that she felt a pull to become a part of their disorganization. At first, she thought it was simply a matter of instinct, self-preservation, seeking the security of being in a group. Later she realized what she was experiencing was envy. 

The casual way in which they treated one another, the mutual degrees of respect, the blatant /fondness/ they displayed, for no seemingly good reason…It reminds her of home in a different way. She can only compare their behavior to that of her own facet-sisters, back in a time when they were all freshly-cut and hadn’t yet learned what was expected of them. 

Somehow Peridot’s feet have managed to carry her back to the festivities, in the midst of all her thoughts. Amethyst is doing an excellent job of breaking up the tension from earlier, by trying to find out how many hot-dogs she can fit in her mouth at once. Pearl is chiding her about leaving some food for the humans, mentioning how it’s rude to eat all of Greg’s hard work. Greg doesn’t seem to mind however, after seeing Steven keeping tally for Amethyst and laughing.

It’s a welcome distraction, and Peridot keeps a close proximity to either Steven, or Amethyst, or both of them, for the next few hours. She ‘plays’ with them, joins in on making jokes, and steals existentially-minded glances at everyone in the group. She observes each of her…’friends’, and watches the VHS-tape of her own crystalline-memory rewind and fast-forward, showing key moments of her relationship with all of them.

Around a campfire, after a few rounds of chatter and singing, it becomes apparent that the humans need to sleep soon. This would be the cue, they have learned, for Peridot and Lapis to part ways from the Crystal-Gems and return to their own base. Peridot hesitates this time. She makes up a lie, insisting that she wants to try ‘sleeping’. She asks to stay the night.

Lapis doesn’t seem happy about the idea, shooting a meaningful, cold stare at Peridot. Lazuli allows it however, seeing the excitement on Steven’s face. Peridot feels a disconcerting sense of dread creep through her form at that look. She’s seen Lapis angry, heard her shout, argued with her freely…but this is different somehow.

"Slumber partyyy!~"

Steven charges up the stairs, and hoots, arms in the air. Peridot’s legs are frozen in place on the sand, her instincts filling her with indecision. It’s never wise to intentionally-displease your superiors, and the green Gem is caught between the desire to flee into the house and the desire to change her plans so she can avoid later punishment. Not that Lazuli has ever punished her, really, but the programming from homeworld still remains etched into Peridot’s mind.

She’s grateful when Amethyst lifts her up bodily and follows suit after Steven, and she only protests the treatment to fuel the quartz’s laughter. 

***  
She assists Steven and Amethyst in the construction of a blanket fort, though she informs them that such a structure is too flimsy to protect against /any/ form of attack, and is therefore not an apt term. Steven suggests that it’s intended purpose is to protect a sleeping human from ‘nightmares’. Peridot is unconvinced, her understanding of the sleep state being one in which an individual has no control over their emerging thought patterns.

When Steven places a plush creature with a light source in it’s abdomen inside the tent, however, Peridot is able to see some merit in the concept. The illumination reminds her somewhat of the luminescent, crystalline buildings she’s familiar with. As comforting as the sight is, it makes her realize just how dark the earth is, compared to Gem-occupied planets.

There is no distortion-technology here, so the fort is predictably just as cramped on the inside as it appears on the outside. It’s a surprisingly cozy kind of cramped. Steven is a bubbly, gentle, positive presence befitting the gem in his body. From this proximity, Peridot can feel the unique resonances of both Steven’s gem and Amethyst’s on either side of her, as they huddle under the suspended fabric together.

Steven falls asleep quickly, the awkward silence broken by his soft snore just as Peridot thinks to start conversation. Amethyst mumbles idly to her instead, eyes closed and face peaceful, but clearly still conscious. It takes Peridot a moment to fully register what was said. She was too busy studying the other Gem’s features in the artificial glow of the soft-toy nightlight.

"You should tell me about whatever's eating you."

"…I've just been thinking alot lately."

"You said that before. What /kind/ of stuff have you been thinking about?"

"Home."

Amethyst props herself up just slightly and opens her eyes, looking serious.

"The barn with Lapis? Or…?"

"Home-home. The Gems I used to know. The places I used to see. Before I ended up here."

"…Do you miss them?"

"I don't know if it's those things that I miss specifically, or if it's just…familiarity. I suppose I miss my facet-sisters. I miss our chief-of-security, before I got my first assignment."

"What were they like?"

"Well, my sisters were like me of course. Noisy. All of us trying to establish who was best at what, a pecking order. Arguing all the time. But…sometimes we shared cubbies, like this 'fort'. When we were scared. And the chief…Dalma…"

Peridot trails off, cheeks tinting a muted blue. Fear wasn’t the only reason the peridots would pile up together, and she’s just realized that Dalma may have imprinted upon her more than she would like to admit. Thousands of peridots passed through that sorting-station. The Gem in question likely doesn’t even remember /this/ peridot. 

Amethyst catches Peridot’s expression and grins, trying to keep her voice to a whisper for Steven’s benefit.

“Whoooo’s Dalma?~” 

“She’s a quartz. Speckled black and white. Off-colored, like Jasper. She had all these…streaks of white, black, and silver in her hair.”

Peridot notices Amethyst propping her chin in her hands, starry-eyed. She gives the purple Gem a long-suffering look before continuing.

“She had a pretty boring job, really. Had a lot of time on her hands. She was just there in case of emergencies, to prevent in-fighting, that sort of thing. But really, the older supervisor-peridots did most of the work for her. She served as a less harsh mentor compared to the supervisors. She gave all of the fresh-cuts some idea of what it would be like to work with other Gem types. She…also taught us about basic Gem hierarchy and how that hierarchy is maintained through a system of punishment and reward.”

At this point, Amethyst looks less enthused than before, so Peridot sighs and skips to the juicier details.

“Rewards are exclusively delivered by someone higher-ranking than you, and though they can sometimes be a form of material gain…More commonly, they are administered in the form of pleasurable encounters."

"You mean…hum-ding'in it?"

"/What/?"

"You know…"

Amethyst rolls her eyes upwards, sticks out her tongue, and slowly moves her finger in circles around her gem. Peridot blanches, turns a darker shade of mute-blue, and hisses indignantly.

"Yes! That!"

This earns a wheezing, nasally snicker from Amethyst, and Peridot can’t tell if she’s feeling aggravated or just flustered. Amethyst’s laughs are…auditorily-pleasing. Especially so, since the quartz has a tendency to praise and complement Peridot whenever she causes them.

Steven makes a noise of sleepy discontent and the two Gems go silent, waiting until they hear his breathing slow before continuing on in whispers. Amethyst’s gaze is intense, fascinated, with a hint of mischief. Peridot blinks and for a moment forgets what they were discussing.

"So what, you miss gett'in freaky with Big Chief?"

"Auckgh—!!…It's not that…exactly. Just…everything has changed so quickly for me. It feels…unstable. Chaotic. Nothing makes sense anymore, and…I don't like it. I like knowing what to expect."

"Sounds boring."

"Doesn't it…scare you a little, to not know what's going to happen? Or…isn't it frustrating, not knowing what to do when you say or do the wrong thing to someone? Not knowing whose in charge? Or whose orders to follow?"

"Nnnope. Heh, I /like/ chaos. I mean sure, I mess up all the time, but I don't take orders from /anybody/. You know? If you do what someone tells you, it's gotta be because you /want/ to do it. If you hurt somebody you just talk it out. That's all." 

"What if they don't want to talk?"

"Ehh…That's on them I guess. You just keep trying until they decide to unzip their lips. Or don't. You can't make them do anything they don't wanna do."

Peridot thinks over the advice carefully for awhile, and Amethyst watches her face, then frowns a bit.

"Whoah. Are you an' Lapis ok? Have you guys been fighting?"

"Not exactly."

"Whadda you mean 'not exactly'?"

Peridot heaves a sigh. The other Gem is almost glaring at her, stern, so there’s no hope of getting out of the discussion.

"She…doesn't like to be left alone. At first it was nice…I felt like a normal, functional Gem again. It gave me some structure. Some purpose."

"But now she's all clingy. Won't give you your space."

"No…I'm not sure 'clingy' is the right term. She's not really prone to physical touch. It's more…if I want to leave the barn, she just knows somehow. Like she's keeping an eye on me. Territorial."

"Sounds more like controlling…"

"I suppose that's correct, yes."

"Well, that's…totally not ok."

"I don't think I should really complain though…I appreciate that she wants me to stay close by. It makes me feel…important."

"Peri. You /are/ important. Always. Regardless of anyone else…"

"But I feel safer…when someone else is in charge. She's probably just being protective."

"Peri."

"I mean sure, it's fun to do all the stuff I know I wouldn't have been able to do on homeworld. Act crazy. Get in trouble. But it stresses me out. I can't just—Hhk…I can't do it. I can't /always/ be wracking my mind for what to do next. I can't /always/ be doing everything for myself. I'm supposed to be part of a unit. I don't…I can't…"

Peridot’s vision swims, emotional response getting the better of her, and in the next moment Amethyst pulls her close. She’s surrounded by the prickle of a resonance filled with anger, with ferociousness, and at first Peridot shrinks away from it. Amethyst doesn’t let go, her glittering mane of hair seeming to fluff up even more than usual, reacting to her fury. 

"You listen to me, Peri. I'm gonna be 'in charge' for a sec. You. Don't. Need. /Anybody/—to be important. You're stronger than you think you are. You've done so many things all on your own! If you can talk back to Yellow Diamond and beat Jasper, you can tell Lapis to tone herself down too."

The mention of Jasper has the tears finally spilling down Peridot’s cheeks. She recalls the commander as she was onboard the ship; serious, sullen, unhappy. She remembers Jasper brooding in front of port windows, watching the light of stars bleed past. All business. No chinks in her mental armor.

That day in the kindergarten, Jasper was like a cornered and wounded beast. The flicker of betrayal in her eyes when Peridot declared herself a Crystal-Gem, the fear, the anger, the desperation. It’s all coming back suddenly. Peridot inhales sharply, brings herself back to the present. Back to Amethyst’s neck against her face. 

"But I don't /want/ to be on my own."

"…You're not. You have all of us now. You just gotta stand up for yourself. I mean, if I did something that you didn't like? I would /fully/ expect you to tell me about it. How else would I know? I can't read'jur thoughts. You gotta talk to Lapis. Just like your doing right now, with me. That's an order, ok?"

Peridot snorts a bit and nods, then wraps her arms around the quartz’s neck with the barest of whimpers. 

“Amethyst.”

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm ready to try sleeping now."


End file.
